Actually Republicans DO Have Horns Growing Out Of Their Heads They Just File Them Down

or Overheard At The Coffee Shop

I like to write at coffee shops. Getting out of the house or the office helps me focus on my writing instead of the television, chores that need to be done or other distractions.

Coffee shops can also provide a good source of material for rants, blog posts, fiction and articles. Today, for example I was sitting at Zeitgeist in Pioneer Square just drinking my latte (no I don't wear Birkenstocks) and doing a little bit of writing when three guys sat down at the next table and started talking a bit too loudly. I was doing a pretty good job of ignoring them until one of them said...

"...a Republican and you don't have horns growing out of your head."

That got me thinking, and you know what... Republicans DO have horns growing out of their head most of them just file them down. For example:

FOX News: Files their horns down with "Fair and Balanced"
Bill O'Reilly: "No Spin Zone"
John McCain: "Straight Talk Express"
George W. Bush: Good ol' boy, man of the pepple, werkin' at his ranch
Dick Cheney: ...wait you can actually SEE his horns if you squint just right.

My point is that Republicans get upset when people see them as evil bastards but they don't do anything to disavow themselves of the elements of their party that are either pretty damn evil or are evil enablers; you know "the guy who runs in to the convenience store to get Satan a pack of cigarettes."

A Day in the Life of Joe Republican

Note: Normally I like to write at least some original content when I post but this is too good to let go by and its late.

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Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

See the rest here thanks to Tom Tomorrow.